I Grew Up Broke but Now Earn $300,000 – How Do I Stop Worrying About Money?

It’s not uncommon to grow up without having a lot of money and then, as soon as you find yourself with some money, allow a sense of unease to grow in the back of your mind. Not only is this not uncommon, but it would almost be worse if you didn’t take a minute to consider your situation. 

Many people understand this situation. They also grew up without many materialistic things and suddenly find that they can have what they want and need, and this Redditor feels exactly that way. Posting in r/personalfinance, they grew up broke and now make a combined $300,000 with their spouse, giving them more financial freedom. 

As a result of this turn of events, they have sharp memories of how difficult life was growing up, and now that they feel lucky, there is always a lingering sense of not having enough. 

The Situation 

It’s completely fair that the Redditor poses this whole concern as a philosophical one, more so than a real-world concern, but it doesn’t eliminate the red flags in their mind. Now, in their mid-40s, with a wife and 6-year-old son, they live in suburban Chicago and have a combined income of over $300,000. 

Growing up, they recognized that things were not going well, as they say their house got foreclosed on, and they often lived on peanut butter and government cheese. As the original poster’s parents spent a lot of time dealing with substance abuse and living on SSI and public assistance, it doesn’t seem like there are a lot of great childhood memories floating around. 

On the other hand, the Redditor’s wife grew up with parents who worked hard to give their children a better life. This is great, but it doesn’t stop them from thinking that everything could fall apart quickly and that they could end up in dire straits. 

Knowing that life is miserable when you have no money, it’s comforting to know money is available for health issues. Of course, having concerns that “the other shoe is going to drop” isn’t good and leads to questions about maybe seeing someone to talk through these concerns. 

Stop the Worrying

None of this situation is helped by the idea that the original poster continues to support one elderly parent and has $50,000 of personal credit card debt from a previous “personal emergency.” The good news is that they are steadily paying it off with zero-interest balance transfers. 

Even with this debt and parental concern, the larger issue is identified in this post’s first comment. There isn’t a doubt in my mind or that of other Redditors that this person’s past had a powerful impression and has left them with an ongoing feeling of both anxiety and fear. 

The good news is that even with the credit card debt, things look good, and a family is there to support everyone. This Redditor should lean on his wife for moral and budget support to help assure himself that there are no immediate problems that would have them homeless in a month or two. 

Therapy and Savings 

The couple has around $25,000 in savings, and once the credit card is paid off, the savings account should start growing considerably. There is also an employer-matched 401(k) (maxed out annually), Roth IRA, and investment portfolio. 

Combine all this, and the Redditor’s fears are irrational by their own admission. Worrying about compounding emergencies happening all at once is just anxiety taking control of the brain and giving everyone unnecessary worries. 

I know that everyone has fears, and in today’s economic climate, there is a definite concern about what happens if one or both spouses suddenly lose their jobs. Still, this means you don’t go wild while you have a job, so you are ready if something happens. 

The best course of action is for this Redditor to find someone to talk to and work through these fears. If they can remove some of this worry and enjoy an opportunity to live in the now, they will be a better parent, spouse, and son. 

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