Self-made at 31, earning over $400k a year – do I keep my wealth quiet or enjoy the finer things?

There are a lot of great things about being a self-made millionaire at 31. However, one Reddit user has found that there are also some challenges as well.

Specifically, the poster has found himself in a situation where he feels different from his peers. He doesn’t think many people have the wealth he does, and he isn’t sure whether he should try to keep quiet about the money he has or splurge and buy the things that he wants to purchase in order to enjoy his life to the fullest. 

So, what should the Redditor do in order to balance enjoying his success with maintaining a low profile and not letting all of his friends know that he is a millionaire?

How can you enjoy your wealth without giving away that you’re rich?

A lot of people are uncomfortable with others knowing how much money they have — especially if they have millions in their 30s. This Redditor seems like he may be one of them, since he was looking for advice on whether he should buy the things he’s been hoping for or try to live a simpler lifestyle. 

The reality is, that’s a hard problem to solve. Obviously, if you work hard to make money, you should get to enjoy it — especially if you are also doing smart things like investing for an early retirement or at least to build a secure future. However, many of the things that you may want are going to tip off others to the fact that you have money.

For example, if you want to buy a large house to live in, or a boat to sail around on, or a fancy car to drive, people in your life are going to notice that. This may make you feel uncomfortable, and it may also put you into a situation where you are pressured to provide financial help you’d rather not give.

The fact is, you’re going to have to deal with this situation and accept one of two undesirable outcomes: Either you need to:

• Live more frugally than you desire or can afford
• Accept that others are going to know you have money.

For most people, the second of these options is preferable, as there’s very little reason to endure years of sacrifice when you have the money to enjoy yourself — just to avoid having other people know you are rich. If people in your life really give you a lot of hassle because they find out you have a lot of financial resources, then maybe they don’t actually belong in your life at all.

Aim to strike a balance between enjoying life and avoiding ridiculous expenses

While you should not let the opinions of others stand in the way of enjoying your money, at the same time, you may want to be somewhat reasonable regarding the number of big, showy purchases you make.

You can, for example, buy a really nice car and a really nice house and just deflect questions about your wealth by saying you saved up — but if you buy a Ferrari and a 10,000 square foot mansion at the same time, that’s going to raise more questions.

Conspicuous consumption isn’t really great for your anonymity, or, ultimately, for your pocketbook, because even if you have plenty of money now, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be a wise steward of your resources. Your best bet is going to be to decide what things you really value spending money on, to make those purchases even if doing so may raise eyebrows, and to avoid wasteful spending just for the sake of it, because you can.

A financial advisor can help you to decide what’s worth buying, and can work with you to develop strategies that ensure your money is accessible and used to enjoy life without risking your long-term security or making yourself a target among those who don’t understand how you could be worth so much.

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