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How to ask for clarification multiple times without appearing to challenge?
Sometimes when someone is asked to clarify something, especially with "Why?", they might read the subtext as: "I disagree, and I challenge you to defend what you said!" If it's a decision, they may think their judgement is being questioned, and if it's a statement of fact or opinion, they may think its credibility or validity is in doubt. An example conversation might go something like this: Arthika: Should we put the foo somewhere in the bar? Bartók: Why's that? Arthika: Well, remember baz? Bartók: Yeah — that was the time when all the quxes happened. Arthika: Right, so then we should put the foo in the bar? Bartók: I'm not following the logic. Arthika: If we take the foo, we could then put it in the bar. Bartók: Sounds good, I'm not against that, but what's the link with baz? Sorry for being a bit slow... Arthika: Never mind, it was just a question. What are some things Bartók can do better in order to clearly communicate that he's interested and invested in understanding the reason for the suggested course of action, and not trying to poke holes in it?
Sometimes when someone is asked to clarify something, especially with "Why?", they might read the subtext as: "I disagree, and I challenge you to defend what you said!"
If it's a decision, they may think their judgement is being questioned, and if it's a statement of fact or opinion, they may think its credibility or validity is in doubt.
An example conversation might go something like this:
Arthika: Should we put the foo somewhere in the bar?
Bartók: Why's that?
Arthika: Well, remember baz?
Bartók: Yeah — that was the time when all the quxes happened.
Arthika: Right, so then we should put the foo in the bar?
Bartók: I'm not following the logic.
Arthika: If we take the foo, we could then put it in the bar.
Bartók: Sounds good, I'm not against that, but what's the link with baz? Sorry for being a bit slow...
Arthika: Never mind, it was just a question.
What are some things Bartók can do better in order to clearly communicate that he's interested and invested in understanding the reason for the suggested course of action, and not trying to poke holes in it?
