Dave Ramsey’s Advice For A Couple Who Won’t Combine Money After A Decade Lands Hard.

Is it a good idea to have a long-term marriage and maintain separate finances? A woman named Amy who called into the Dave Ramsey show was grappling with this issue recently.

Amy and her husband had been married for a decade and together for 13 years. They’d never combined finances because she felt her husband wasn’t as responsible with money as she was but now she’d lost her job and was questioning the wisdom of keeping things separate. 

While it may seem a little opportunistic to decide to combine finances when she has suddenly has no income, Ramsey had some blunt words for Amy about the way the couple had been managing their money. It’s advice other married couples may want to consider as well. 

Ramsey believes maintaining separate finances isn’t the right move in a marriage

Ramsey was very clear that maintaining separate financial lives was not the right move for married couples, as most couples who are financially successful team up and combine their money so they can work together towards shared goals.

He believes firmly that when you say wedding vows, you merge your life into one — including your financial life. And, he said that couples need to find consensus and get on the same page about their finances if they want things to work. 

As far as the caller’s concerns about her husband’s irresponsibility, Ramsey said the couple needed to set shared financial goals and make a joint plan for managing money that works for both of them. He told the caller she couldn’t make her husband be responsible, but that if they talked openly and created a plan together, her husband should choose to do the right things for the good of the marriage and family. 

A financial advisor could be invaluable in helping the couple to do this, as an advisor could work with the couple to decide what’s important to them, to evaluate their income and spending needs, and to use their money wisely in a way that makes them both happy now and in the future. 

The layoff shows why Ramsey’s advice makes sense

Married couples handle their money in all sorts of different ways, and what works well for one couple may not work well for another. However, Amy’s situation is a good example of why it often does make sense for people who are married to share financial burdens as they go through life together. 

Marriages should last for decades, barring divorce or some other disaster, and during that time, it is inevitable that people will experience many different life circumstances including setbacks or changes that affect their ability to work. 

Whether you have a job loss, an illness, take time off from work to have a baby or care for an aging parent, or decide to go back to school to pursue your dream job, your earning power may change over time. You don’t necessarily want to feel like you can’t keep up your end of the shared bills or feel indebted to your spouse if they cover your shared costs during these transition periods or low times. 

Supporting each other through these things is a part of being married, and if you have a shared financial life, this should happen automatically and effortlessly.  Ramsey believes this is the best way, and it’s worth it for couples to consider the perks of someone having their back when they decide if joint or separate finances are the way to go. 

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